At The Bottom Of Everything

Classified

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 10:27:39 GMT

We’re shaping up to be all you whish you could have been. Open eyes it’s a brand new season, a brand new season. There isn’t anything I haven’t heard and you know I’m not convinced, for the first time in my life I’m asking the world who I am and not me. Close the doors and take the stairs, up and down, upside down. Your always acting like an overdramatic actor who is starving for attention with one last job to make it happen. You played your part by being invited but I’m not impressed nor excited. Dive right in, I’m not like them I wont buy it. Take back everything you have ever said because you don’t mean a word of it you never did. I regret everything that I ever said to make you feel like something special or like you ever really mattered. It’s the phrase that pays right? Why do you stock pile memories in the corner of a room? I don’t know how we got this sick. Is it serious? I’m afraid it is. Am I gonna die? Well guess what boy your time is coming quicker than mine is. I make plans to break plans and I’m planning something big. We’re sceptics and true believes. Your selfish and I’m sorry that your going no where fast.

When I look back my life looks like the classified pages of what’s for sale, hey here’s lot 45 she’s got a decent voice, she’ll keep you warm. Take her home for just 999. When you said “things are falling apart” I thought you meant that you were falling apart.

The once ambitious now hold the smoking gun.

Always Up and Down, never Down and Out

Sun, 17 Feb 2008 14:30:03 GMT

Dream of daemons when you sleep that make you stutter when you speak. Speak now or forever hold your piece in pieces. I work in daylight feeding fashion to housewife’s, for once I wanna take chances on truck stops and providence lines. Go on there not listening; tell them twice and then three times is just right. I’ve got my pride and I’ll let you sleep tonight because I’m almost home. I’m missing you to death, now my friends are dropping like flies, theres a smoking gun and I know how to use it. I’m on my feet I’m on my feet our time is almost here our time is almost here our time is alone here our time is almost here.

The patron saint of back yard arsonists.

Tue, 12 Feb 2008 23:38:35 GMT

And for the first time in my life I feel my heart jump and the mood becomes so serious…and we smile awkwardly at each other with a bit of an evil chuckle. Today was…alright, work was alright. The foreign kid, she broke the coffee machine and now I’m fucked off.

Oh dear god please, get me out of here before I smack her fucking face in.

Small talk still seems so awkward.

The [Carpel] Tunnel Of Love

Sun, 03 Feb 2008 15:53:09 GMT

Seems to be the same each day. Work. Work. Work.
I’m not sure what the trouble was that started this, the reasons may have run away but the feeling never did. Its not what I would recommend but it is a way to live, what seems simple in the moonlight by the morning never is. A teenage vow in a parking lot; “tell death do us part.” I’m glad I didn’t die before I met you, this is the first day of the rest of my life, I swear we’re born in doorways. Blankets on the beach and lipstick kisses. Stop burning bridges and start driving off them. I don’t know where I am but I know where I want to go, so I thought I would let you know that these things are taking forever and I’m running in slow mo. I wonder if I can still go home, I could go anywhere with you and still be happy, if you come with me there is no telling we’ll just have to see. I’d rather work for a paycheck then wait to win the lottery but still….maybe it will get better. Swapped baby blues for wideeyed browns. We all are just taking sour sips from lies lush lips and shaking hips in relationships. Come with me and stomp out this disaster town and put your eyes to the sun and tell me; “I know you are just blinding to keep back what the clouds are hiding.” I know I’m singing a little too soon but I love to throw stones at glass moons and bullet words at the mocking birds singing. I get postcards from former selves saying “how you been.” I know someone who knew someone who knows someone I once knew. Oh but were so miserable and stunning, we’re the new faces of failure better and younger but not any better off. Do you realise we’re crashing but we’re no wave? The money is running out the casinos are burring down the police are getting nervous. There is quite on the street today I think I know what is going on. Emergency someone is acting honestly. Tie them up shot them down and never let them speak again! This is a plague on all out homes, the gutter and prisons we will go your rigging all the fights and siding with the cheat the television pits and the wives are crying. The father tells the truth when the adverts are lying. The factory cheats and the industry lies. The criminal waves and the officer smiles, the money is safe whatever the cost. Tell my why don’t hear the warnings? The loyaltys lost and the drinkers are drunk. We wont have jobs in the morning. If I song a song for economics the numbers never add up. I am lost, I am debt, I am failure. I’m the damage that a dream does. Everyone is stabbing their friends in the back. There are bonfires in my head and criminals in my head, my heart is slowing down until it stops, this train is off the rails and the devils in the deep end…no one notices. There’s bonfires in my head, and a crushing in my chest, desperate and lonely, the hospital is empty. Its not enough to say I’m sorry for all the pain and the worry what are you waiting for give up on me and leave. We’re just sixty six sleepers from summer. We see what no one else say before a blind man on the edge of the world with nothing at all, all roads lead to no where, I know I lost my way, don’t make me a leader I’ll lead you the wrong way. Just let me sing sad songs to write my wrongs. Empty heart, winter riot hopeless blue, I have ideas for falling and a voice telling us to hold on.